29 and a half

There's this "insecurity, what do people think of me? Wait, what do I think of things? Do I even believe this? I have no idea what I'm doing, why can't I just trust my gut and go for things?" tunnel that a lot of people experience in their 20's.

For me this was a phase that felt moody, where I second guessed myself all the time and couldn't lock down who I really was. A phase where I questioned everything I believed and tried to be all things to everyone except to God + myself. There was a disconnect, I felt kinda like a robot. Bipolar disorder didn't help. But somewhere in my mid to late 20's I saw the light at the end of the tunnel. I glimpsed a more bold me. A deeply in love me. A me that was a confident mom, friend, and just all around good natured, kind, beliving, honest person. It looked like 30.

Today was my half birthday which means that there are just 6 months left!

Unlike most people, I've been waiting to be 30 for what feels like a long time and I'm happy that it's looking like it is going to be everything I hoped for! A strong marriage, strong faith, good kiddos, and most of all confidence in myself, my family, my creativity, and where this life God has given me is going.

I have discovered myself through my husband, through my kids, and through my closests friends. I get to see myself for who I am and who I am meant to be.

I have finally learned to be me unapologetically. I have learned that I can be the soft, caring, conservative, motherly type of person I am AND the impulsive, free spirit, rainbow hair type of person AND the girl boss, queen, confident lady type of person all in one as long as I create boundaries and don't burn myself out. 

Only 6 months of my 20's left and there are so many things brewing, happening, and just falling into place. Cheers 29.5! I'm so ready for ya!