So I've gotten really bad at this blogging thing.

I started this blog when we were expecting Isabella. When Douglas was 2. When I had insomnia and needed an emotional outlet and something to pass the time. Especially in the middle of the night, something that wasn't too loud and wouldn't wake anyone up.

Now, this blog is just something that is in the back of my mind and I think, "I should blog about this.. but when?"

I miss it. I need it.

Right now though, I just can't. I can't write long posts where I just spill my guts out about any and everything.

I CAN however have short bursts of inspiration. I can share awesome, lovely and funny stories. 

So Instagram has been jam. But I suck at being conciece and not everything I think has a photo to go along with it. + I also like sharing links and funny things. I started a tumblr and really want to get into it. We'll see

Isabella will be 5 this weekend. 5!! It feels like I can start doing things again and I'm getting me back. She's more independent, she can just hang out and be cool. If you're a mom, you understand the pleasure this brings.

Of course now that the fog is lifting I can see everything. I look around and see my neglected EmmaMade shop, this blog, not to mention my house. My house is bad you guys. It's like the last 5 years have been nothing but me stashing things out of sight to go through them later. If you come over, don't open closets or cabinet doors please. I haven't painted all of the walls I've wanted to paint. Though the ones I have look pretty awesome. I feel like I'm always playing catchup. I want to do so many things but I have to clean up first or find that one thing but I don't remember where I left it. No more! I'm handling this! I'm hoping that this summer // fall will be my time to catch up.

Then again.. if you read my previous post you'll know that my mood can change in no time. So we'll see.

But I do hope to be able to have more of a balance in my life. I want to actively pursue that and not just expect it to happen. I'm already seeing it start to happen and it makes me happy and fills me with so much glee. I miss my favorite boy when he's at school from 8-3, and I know that I'll miss my favorite girl too when she has to leave me for kindergarten this fall. However, I also cannot wait! I know that having some structure and time without them will make me a happier, healthier person and therefore a better mom.